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Contemplation



I like this photo a lot. From Taipei Times.

Haven't had much to say or post lately. I've been keeping myself extremely busy with lab, class work, club activities, and personal stuff. Long days that typically start at 8 am and don't really finish until midnight. Even then I feel I don't have enough time to do everything I want. I definitely haven't been able to find time to play games anymore. It's sad in a way. Gaming is such a stress reliever for me, but I just have so much to do. I do make sure I get some tennis or basketball in daily, so that's good. This is turning into a rambling post. Maybe I do have lots to say, just haven't thought it all through...that's why typing is so much easier than speaking. You just let the fingers work whatever word comes to mind, and then you can look back on what you just typed and think about it.

I need to spend the next few days doing my own things again. Definitely last few days I've sort of allowed myself to be consumed by others, you know, club activities and girl stuff. Since my duties are now basically done, and the other stuff is well, the "yuan fun" will only go so far...I need to focus on myself again. I've been pretty much alone all my life. I do have a loving family, but that's different. It's something you are born into. Relationships that don't come by birth I haven't done too well in. Maybe it's me...maybe the right person just hasn't come around. Do they ever? Anyways, I'm not going to sit around and worry about it. I've done that before and it doesn't get you anywhere. Life moves on, you're still friends, good friends even, and you meet new people. That's the beauty of life. It doesn't always go as you want it, maybe what you want isn't the best for you, but you had a good time and fun memories, learn as you go and greet the next day with a smile. Gee that felt good, getting it out of the system. I think the beauty of blogging in some sense is you know some people out there, strangers or not, are reading this, and without actually saying out loud your thoughts face to face, you can vent. Someone will read it, whether they care or not is already of less importance. It's different from talking to a wall, though I know there are plenty of walls that are important religious prayer sites. So maybe it's not so different.

On a more cheery note, I think the next few weeks we are primed for major progress in the lab. This is enough to get me all excited about things. I'm looking forward to this next batch of samples and also finally setting up the new system as most of the major components have finally arrived. It's time to get some results! That will at the least move graduation and getting out of Durham closer to being just a little less far away from in sight, heh. So focus!

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